Why it's so hard to rest

even though it's what we crave.

Don’t we all have a vision of ourselves resting? When I see beautiful nature on instagram or I have a holiday come up, I immediately imagine myself being there, resting, just at peace. However when I’m in beautiful nature myself, there’s one thing that comes up frequently: restlessness.

While we can argue that this is because our bodies are in a hypervigilant state because of stress, I want to argue that it goes deeper than this. I believe it’s our suppressed emotions, that come up exactly when we just wanted to relax and enjoy the view. And it’s because we're a bit more present in these moments, that we become aware of what we have suppressed. This in turn can create a feeling of: I want to move on and not feel this.

What is standing between me and the feeling of just being?

I’m currently spending my summer in the english countryside, surrounded by beautiful nature. Every evening I take my dog on the most beautiful walk around Windsor, while I catch myself thinking: “I should be enjoying this more”.

So I ask myself: “What is standing between me and the feeling of just being?”. And for me its all the emotions I hadn’t dealt with, during the day or…my lifetime.

So I’m giving them space, allowing them to be there, and processing them in a way that feels both gentle and effective for me. It’s ironic how after letting go of the expectation of how I want to feel, at the end of my walk I usually feel the peace I’m longing for. The trees look different, and there’s a feeling of joy, without any desire to be somewhere else.

I hope you’re having a beautiful summer and allowing yourself to feel whatever needs to come up.

Sending love

Sonja